Three Plus One: Part I

I have been MIA. For FOUR months. I know, it is clearly and utterly unacceptable. Neveretheless, I am back, full throttle, as a proud mommy of two.

As many of you know, I was expecting baby number two and anxiously awaiting her arrival when I last wrote. Well, four and a half months ago, at the end of October (SPOLIER ALERT: Not on Halloween), my husband and I welcomed our precious daughter into the world. She was 7 pounds 5 ounces and 20 inches long. She was and still is the most beautiful little girl.

As I am sure some of you all can appreciate, adjusting to two takes some time. I really wanted to enjoy the minutes, hours, days, which unapologetically turned into months. But I am finally ready to share the details. So here is the newest five-part blog series.

Part One: Preparing for Baby

I am pretty sure I wrote about my son’s birth story in a prior post, but for recap, I woke up with what I thought was the flu, had no idea I was in labor, surprise, I was in labor, had baby via “emergency” c-section ten days early because he was frank breech.

FAST FORWARD, to my second pregnancy, I desperately wanted a vbac (vaginal brith after c-section). I was picturing labor starting (this time knowing it was labor), water breaking, driving to the hospital in the middle of the night, and a seamless, smooth, wonderful birth. I felt so great during my last few weeks of pregnancy.

We (I)finished decorating the nursery, finished the sewing projects I was working on, washed some laundry, packed the hospital bag (in the car), put the car seat base in the car, washed the bottles, put together the bassinet, I had everything ready. All we had to do was wait.

I had a job promotion of sorts, so work was keeping me so busy as I was adjusting to a “newer” set of responsibilities. At this point there was no question that I was due soon. Everyone seemed to be staring, waiting for me to pop, literally.

Well, the second week of October, my mother came to stay for a week. My husband was on his yearly hunting trip with his dad. Weather was nice, my son and I were desperately soaking up the last few minutes of just mommy and son before he had to start sharing me. Every night, I prayed that I didn’t have the baby until my husband made it home. Thankfully, baby stayed put.

That following week, some of our best friends tied the knot. Per doctor’s orders, I was not allowed to travel (stupid if you ask me, because I didn’t have baby girl then either.)

Finally, the week before Halloween, my last full week of work before leave, (my estimated due date was Nov. 2). The final countdown until we  got to meet our baby girl. As I mentioned, we had an evacuation date set for Halloween if I had to have another c-section. Baby was head down but not in the best position. So, I rechecked everything. Everything was ready. I triple rechecked. Everything was still ready. OK. Good. Awesome. We are ready. Phew.

Then I cried. I cried from the overwhelming emotions of having another baby, finally meeting my daughter, the daughter I prayed for. The daughter who didn’t yet have a name. I cried, because my son was no longer going to be my only. I cried from the guilt of him growing up so soon…he wasn’t even two yet. Was I mommy to just him long enough? I cried just because I couldn’t stop crying….damn hormones.